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Tuesday, August 21, 2007

i'm giving up trying to explain

because in any case, you will find something else to justify yourself..

but just so you know, we didn't even say anything about your attitude. in any case, absence and tardyness is enough to get us boiling and giving us attitude after you are in the wrong really sent us through the roof... no amount of discussion prior to what we have decided would have changed the outcome... as you said, we should have seen this coming... the protocol applies both ways my dear, if you were so unhappy the day before you could have been the one to take initiative to talk to us and explain your situation... rather than giving us the cold shoulder and black face the whole day and clearly ignoring us...

we love you and treat you as a good friend, accomodating your moodyness and cold shoulders, but enough is enough.. there is a limit to how much we can take..... you may be our friend, but that doesn't mean you can climb onto our heads and expect us to smile happily and ask you if you would like some tea and biscuits while you are up there...

since you've said that you understand our stand and why we did what we did, perhaps you should stand in our shoes... after lugging the tonnes of equipment, planning the whole project, doing research and pulling everything together, just the two of us, perhaps you will understand why we are so upset and disappointed.. and why we feel that the grade that we produced by our sweat and blood (literally) should belong to us...

with this, what's done is done, what has been said has been said... whether you believe it or not, i really do value our friendship and well, i just feel we need time to cool down before we tackle the many issues we've left unsaid these past 4 months... i hope you truely understand why we resorted to this...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

group projects have really strained many relationships, its been hard separating work and friendship... many things were left unsaid and swept under the rug... many expectations left me feeling disappointed...

it is not easy being a friend and a project mate... there's a fine line that separates being a friend and proj mate... being a friend its hard to be demanding of your friend who is at the same time your project mate whom which your grades depend on... and so you carry your project mate's load on to your own shoulders to salvage your, by this time already frail, friendship... but eventually and surely there is a straw that breaks the camel's back...

as a friend i try to cover for you
as a project mate i feel overloaded and

as a friend i forgive you
as a project mate i feel that its very unfair

but being a friend doesn't mean i'll be more lenient on you
being a project mate doesn't mean i can't be friends with you

its just so hard to find a balance between friends and projects.....

the moral of the story: don't do projects with friends.............

sigh.. honestly, its quite depressing and its distracting me from studying.. and as opposed to the previous post, i really would much rather be studying now than blogging... but i really cannot concentrate there's just too much on my mind... at this point, i really wouldn't mind having a bf to talk to.... but nvm cuz i have you guys to talk to.. so.... its comforting to some extent... =)


10:09 PM